It's not that easyyy

Forgive... and forget?
illi faat maat? (meaning whats done is done)

We all mistakes, no exceptions, no doubt about it
Some mistakes are worse than others
but most of us do deserve forgiveness
however, when you forgive are you supposed to forget as well?
i guess these questions are best answered when put in a certain context...

let's take cheating on your boyfriend/girlfriend as an example
two people very much in love
have been together for just under two years
they are far apart and sadly long distance isnt helping their relationship at all
the girl gets close to a guy, really close, too close
hasnt done anything wrong with him... yet
the guy is sitting thousands of miles away clueless and oblivious to whats going on behind his back
poor him ... right?

lets just say the girl was neglected and felt that was justification to sort of find a replacement for the compassion and love she used to get from her boy friend
in her mind this is the perfect reason to get close to a guy, close enough that she was lying to her bf about how close they were getting
now everytime the girl tries to talk to the guy he is just not there for her--- ever
she is alone
but she has this close "friend"
now this guy although he may have started out with good intentions, now sees the perfect situation
the perfect opening into this girls heart or more likely her pants....
on a side note: one of my very good friends once told me that one of the easiest girls to steal away from a guy is one that feels neglected, all you have to do is listen and be everything her bf is not being
the other guy took advantage, the girl let it happen, the bf had no idea what was going on
the bf never imagined that the girl would ever leave him
it was one of those situations where they were so in love, that he thought theres no way she could fall for anyone else, shes mine forever, i dont have to work for her anymore ***
the bf stopped trying.. stopped being there for her... although she tried so hard
so hard .. repeatedly to a point where she couldnt try anymore
and some people are just the type that cant let things be and wait to see what happens
they have to fix, and if it wont work and the guy shows NOO sign NO sign at all that he is going to change or do anything at alll....
they need to find something else that will work or would rather have nothing

but ofcourse for the girl... she had the other manipulative guy to be her knight in shining armor (pffft)
she fell right into his trap knowingly and unknowingly ... i actually dont know....
she left her bf
she couldnt take it anymore
she promised her self it was not because of the new guy
but on some level it was
but mostly it was because she had to get away away away
and show her bf that she wasnt going to take it anymore

it was meant to a break
but the new guy had not gone through so much trouble, so much fakeness to get nothing in return
the girl... well she was just an idiot... no excuses
they fooled around
no details - yuck i dont even want to think about the details they make me want to vomit

can the girl ever forgive herself for giving up the guy she loved, and would eventually marry?
can she forgive herself for not trying enough?
can she forgive herself for being so dirty (the fooling around)?

can the bf forgive himself for giving up the girl that he loved?
the star question: can the bf forgive the girl for what she did with the guy?



***totally irrelevant addition connected to where i left the stars above ***
girls doesnt it suck when men sort of give up once they have you?
like before they know you like them, they jump through hoops to impress you
they tell you they love you, they woo you every chance they get
they are perfect... to perfect
obviously it cant last forever!
but as soon as they get you, its like they sealed you for themselves
and very fast they stop trying and do nothing
they become a log of wood - emotionless and actionless
annoying isnt it?